Getting feedback from outsiders normally is more difficult because you can be the shiniest prettiest girl outside but if you don’t glow from inside, and if you don’t smile, people won’t be interested.
I met with my friend one day. She was very miserable. She didn’t smile, she was negative and she got upset because one particular guy hadn’t responded. I couldn’t hold myself back and told her if she was as miserable and uninterested as she was now with me then I wasn’t surprised he hadn’t called. I asked her to look inside and ask herself when she changed so much that her mood depended on a loser responding?! It really is his loss anyway. She is smart and pretty, honestly she is. The next day she called me and thanked me, explaining how much it helped to open her eyes. In three days her whole attitude changed. She started to concentrate on herself and all the things she likes doing and guess what, within a week she had three offers on the table! People feel you more than you think. If you are negative and you can only talk about the past and you don’t smile they won’t find you interesting. Also if you have lots on, instead of sitting at home and feeling bored, you do have a better chance to attract people and you will have good stories to share, which makes you interesting! It’s best if you know how to listen. I had a period when I said so much so fast to a new person cos I wanted them to like me and show them how nice I was, but instead I got told that I talk a lot and too fast and thus was very annoying. Not a big science is it. That’s when I told myself a nice little line: just shut the f*ck up! Worked perfectly.
The best book to read which helps you to love yourself again and find your confidence: Louise Hay – How to heal your life (this book is beyond amazing, it is a must)
(Author: An, edited by my lovely friend Sarah)
Next: The girl with the 100 date challenge on Tinder
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