This Tinder craziness is something I could try and stay away from but I have to admit it is very entertaining and can cause a pointless addiction in no time. Surely it’s such a natural instinct to want to get to the end of a story, but the problem with Tinder is it is a never-ending story!
When my friend stayed for the weekend she introduced me to the Tinder world. Very simple and your judgment is based purely on appearance. And you can enjoy dismissing others without them finding out. Apparently it was designed for hook-ups and one night stands. My guess is that this is better suited for guys than girls, however not always. According to a friend “Girls go on Tinder to find a husband, guys go on Tinder for a one night stand!”. I couldn’t possibly comment on this.
This app is a very fast paced. Finding someone here is even faster than on Plenty of Fish, Match etc. I knew this girl who signed up after her break-up and got so excited at the beginning (adrenaline). It gave her the confidence she needed and even started an excel file with the dates she had. Only a couple of weeks later the steam ran out and she lost interest. One day she said this: “No matter how many I am meeting and how much time they each take, I realise there is no point. None of them are him (the ex, let’s call him John). I can try to meet them all whilst waiting for another exact “John” to turn up but it won’t happen. Cos they are not him. No one is like him.”
I could feel her pain. I couldn’t agree more. I needed such a long time to be able to look up. Hated everybody who was using the freaking “you need time” expression. But they were right of course. And she reached this point. I was so proud of her. She is a survivor. A smart one. Seeing her agony and fight how she digested this was very painful. This journey is never easy…
PS: when you are ready, your confidence is back and you feel that you are yourself again just go for it! When you are independent emotionally, you can see through players better and you are not desperate so you won’t put up with the ones normally you wouldn’t 😉
(Author: An, edited by my lovely friend Sarah)
Next: God save us all from married men!