It’s crazy how scared girls can be of becoming single. Some feel the stigma so strong and are so scared of this status that they would rather stay in a shitty relationship! In extreme cases they get beaten up or put up with an alcoholic a**hole just because they are scared to be own their own. Scared to be independent? Perhaps the fear of loneliness makes them stay or they can’t even see it because everything looks different when you are in a situation like this. Always looks more obvious from the outside. I find it even sadder when somebody tries to build up a fantasy world, faking their happiness.
I am not judging here by the way, I am a big believer in “everybody f*cking up their lives uniquely personal to them”.
Is it really better though to stay in an unhappy relationship just to avoid being single? You can easily waste your time by staying and ending up being single, just not by choice, anyway! The longer you stay the harder it gets.
I have heard this story from my friend who has been single for a couple of years (a fun, gorgeous and smart girl) that her friend once started to cry when she got dumped and got genuinely choked up when she said this: “oh my god, I am going to be single just like you! I can’t believe this, what am I going to do?” My friend of course looked at her and responded calmly. “Don’t worry, it’s not a disease, you will live!”
I don’t have to explain that the other girl is the type of girl who is bloody desperate to find a guy and can never see how lucky she is and how happy she could be if she stopped thinking that life is awful only because she is “alone”.
Some other girls love making a move on their friend’s boyfriends or guys they fancy. Why? Cos this is the exact thing which helps with her confidence. Also they are incapable of selecting on their own, they need to rely on others decisions. Don’t judge, it happens. I don’t think they choose to be this way. For their own benefit hopefully they change and start to grow. If they don’t it is very likely that the whole finding a boyfriend process will take longer.
And I guess I should stop right here 😉
Next: How about a one-bight stand?
(Author: An, edited by my lovely friend Sarah)