Lost in translation…

It is one of those days… The really haunting one. The day when no one “gets” you. You are out of sync. When nothing happens the way you actually planned it. And it feels like having a bubble around the head which stops normal communication.

How can so many things go wrong in one day? It does include personal life and work things at the same time, all within less than 8 hours. Of course the unavoidable  issues with the tube in the morning due to the bus strike… however that could never upset me, it is London, it happens every day… So on this specific day I was still very positive at this point. Really soon things changed…

I almost managed to make myself fired with a simple one sentence message. Wrong wording and timing. Boom! Well done! It was nothing else than very bad communication. Straight after having a completely f*** up conversation with someone I actually fancied at the beginning. Dead business by now but if I had wanted to make a bad Hollywood movie this whole story would have been a massive blockbuster. That type where everything goes wrong and the two characters just can’t make it happen. Broken phone (many complications and wrong assumption), many unexpected unlucky actions and chain reactions and every single text message just simply lost in translation. Like it got translated on the other side with the wrong dictionary. Always makes me wonder how those smart people spin the table throughout a conversation and eventually you come out of the whole story as the nasty person who can’t understand anything. Not sure how but I did it. Like an invisible hand is making sure that it cannot happen. Very strange. Almost funny but it was not at the time.

Also I had an unexpected meeting coming up at work so I couldn’t do any of the tasks I had on my agenda (obviously!). This happens all the time and it is not a problem but not on that day…
Being optimistic I still hoped the day  would turn out to be better later as I was planning to meet with a friend. When I got there I had to wait for an hour (hence the reason you can read this post now) and when she supposed to turn up she canceled our meeting. I am almost scared to go home…

And this is the time when I need to go home to my city again and meet with the people who know me and love me. To be able to get my confidence back and feel normal again. To feel that I am loved and understood. When I can switch off and be myself. Where I can talk to people without even breathing and I don’t have to explain anything or everything. I am just so exhausted at this point I can’t explain. I guess working late every day 2 weeks in a row didn’t help… Let’s recharge those batteries! A day later everything is back to normal 🙂 Thank God for that!

(Author: An, not edited)

Next: How to overcome your fears?

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